Sometimes – only sometimes – I forget kids need naps. BFam and I, as children, were never fans of naps. As teenagers, I lived for them. (Something about growing inches and feet overnight made me tired, where BFam stopped short. Ha. Ha ha. Short. Don’t tell him I said that.) In keeping with genetics, my children are determined to unknowingly follow their parents in disliking naps as well. While Mooter is older and can get away with missing a few winks, Booger isn’t so lucky. She thinks she is. Huh.
[SCENE: A few nights ago after working overtime - so we're talking much later than normal - coming home with the kids...]
Mooter: Mom! Mom! Guess what. We saw Uncle Irvin today [BFam's brother] and guess what. He gave us something. A present. Want to know what it is?
Me: Sure. Wow me.
Mooter: [gesturing to her sister standing alongside] Show her.
[Both pull out two one dollar bills apiece.]
Mooter: Tah-dah! MUN-EHHHH!
Booger: [sobbing] EEEEEEHHHHHHeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrruuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhh!!!
[Mooter and I look at each other, puzzled into stunned silence.]
Booger: [continues sobbing] Aaaaaaah-hah-haaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!
Mooter: [to me] Um. What just happened?
Me: Dude. I was just about to ask you the same thing.
Booger: [wailing] WAAAHH-HAAAA-HAAH-HAAAAAAA!!
Me: Booger. What happened? What’s wrong?
Booger: [drooling] UNCOWH URBAN GAY ME MUNEEEEEEEY-HAA-HAAAAAAH!
Me: Huh?
Booger: [snotting] I NO WANT DUH MUNEEEEEY-HAA-HAAAAAAH!
Me: *??*
Mooter: *??*
Me: [to Mooter] Was she like this when he first gave it to her?
Mooter: [stunned] No! She was excited!
Me: Booger. Um. What did you want instead?
Booger: [hiccups] I wanted *hic* duh *hic* snaaaaacccckkk.
Me & Mooter: *??*
Me: Booger. You realize you can buy snacks… with the money.
Booger: eeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEhhhhhh…
Me: [to Mooter] Did dad get dinner for you guys before you picked me up from work?
Mooter: Nope. He said we’d eat when we got home.
Me: Uh huh. Well there’s problem number one. Booger. Have you had a nap today?
Booger: NOOOOOOO-HO-HOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Me: YAHTZEE!
~HD